Tuesday, March 18, 2014

GOD I wish I had a porpoise grant

I accept and acknowledge that I have posted little to not at all in the last few months.  I have been working on a TV pilot, one in which characters who have given up on meaning go forth in drunken confusion to comment with despairing erudition on a life they neither understand nor approve.  They strive only to despair elegantly.  To stuff their suffering into masks of beauty.

That said, I've also been reading more than I do usually.  Now is neither the time nor the place (well, actually it's both) for a recounting of titles, but let's say only that Moby Dick (by Edmund Welles) is one of them.

I last read the whale book in, like 2002, so I remember it only sparingly.  And I'll tell you what--which you may not believe--it's #@$#@ amazing.  I mean….it's like, this guy, Melville, he could write!  Cetology!

I'm also transcribing a lot of passages, nowadays, thanks to the Kindle, which makes transcribing so easy.  I'm coming more and more to believe that the rote copying of other people's words is the only way to learn to write.  In the past, in Austen's time, e.g, such rote copying was widely accepted as a valid learning method.  Nowadays, not so much.  But it should be.

Anyway, here's a passage I bring forth to you all.  It made me think vividly of Johannes, that criminal guitarist.  The bit at the end is the bit of note, obviously.

It is upon the record, that three centuries ago the tongue of the Right Whale was esteemed a great delicacy in France, and commanded large prices there.  Also, that in Henry VIIIth's time, a certain cook of the court obtained a handsome reward for inventing an admiarable sauce to be eaten with barbacqued porpoises, which, you remember, are a speecies of whale.  Porpoises, indeed, are to this day considered fine eating.  The meat is made into balls about the size of billiard balls, and being well seasoned and spiced might be take for turtl-eballe or veal-balls.  The old monks of Dunfermline were very fond of them.  They had a great porpoise grant from the crown. 

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

my pinball addiction

is just so flippin predictable.

Monday, December 24, 2007

were you able to spot the funny part?

Monday, December 17, 2007

inevitability test

click here.

How do you go further than this?

Thursday, December 13, 2007

the truth could not be more clear

Successful viewing of a page is not necessarily an indication that its encoding is specified correctly. If the page's creator and reader are both assuming some machine-specific character encoding, and the server does not send any identifying information, then the reader will nonetheless see the page as the creator intended, but other readers with different native sets will not see the page as intended.

Monday, October 29, 2007

Berlin is the new capital of the art world

and i think i have just proved that.

Sunday, September 16, 2007


Okay. The photo is called “the game of massacre” and was taken by someone named anonymous a few months ago. Anyway what I want to know is “what the hell is it?” In other words, was this game really called “massacre?” Anyway, is there any way I could play it now?

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

there is totally a lot of thought going into this blog

i just wanted to make that more clear.

is it bad when everyone suddenly turns orange

whenever i log in?

what kind of poems should i write?

“Don’t write love poems; avoid those forms that are too facile and ordinary: they are the hardest to work with, and it takes great, fully ripened power to create something individual where good, even glorious, traditions exist in abundance. So rescue yourself from these general themes and write about what your everyday life offers you”

ok, what the hell

is this song saying?

is it saying "i'm not trying to be clever" or "i'm not trying to wreak havoc?" perhaps it is yet some other confessional musing, which i have not perceived because i'm just not much of a confessor.

Thursday, September 6, 2007

this is my favorite bird right now

Favorite Bird has a question for you!

Favorite Bird has another question for you!


For anyone who's interested there is a stimulating discussion about caffeine going on at Tim's blog here. By the way if you do go over there, just make sure whatever you post is in support of whatever I'm saying. And in total disagreement with anyone who contradicts me. That is best.

P.S. For those of you keeping score at home, this is the first time I have phoned in a post by just sending you to someone else's blog.

I’m my own smoking gun!

Tuesday, September 4, 2007

my recurring dream

You have nothing in your video log.
You have no one in your contacts.
Your bookmarks are dumb.

what, the hell, is going on here?

Monday, September 3, 2007

the best thing about an addiction

is when you've been away from it for a while, that first moment when you come back and hit it, is so great.

who in their right mind doesn’t love surrealism?

but it looked so real!

Local art fan chastised for attempting to make love to surrealist painting last month at notably relaxed art museum. When asked why he did it, he said “to impress my girlfriend and to show the museum staff I was not gay.” Well young man, you’ve definitely done that. You’ve definitely done that.

ok i am going to have to say that that is definitely not a gold horse. bronze horse? could be.

Sunday, September 2, 2007

Joey Greco Advises: "Seek Professional Help"

(video removed due to hand-written request from Viacom.)

and replaced with this:

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

what i'd like to see (and i know you would too)

important questions being asked online

I was in DC monday and yesterday visiting William Christenberry's studio. This is what its like. Amazing. Everyone should love this artist.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

what coldbacon doesn't know

i don't think that coldbacon really understands how much carrie totally rules tank attack. she'll show him. and everyone will be watching. and everyone will know.

living with you is like living in a living nightmare

if you can see this print, you are a 4th grader

click to enlarge

this is the way step inside

for entertainment let's watch each other twist.
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